DEAR ABBY: My grandchildren work as restaurant servers. Once I took them to lunch the opposite day, they mentioned if I used to be going to pay by bank card, I ought to go away the tip for the server in money. (They supplied to pay the child, however it was my deal with, so I mentioned I would go away it.)
They then defined that when a tip is left on the cardboard, the server doesn’t get it instantly as a result of the restaurant waits till it clears after which they receives a commission. Usually, the enterprise will get round to doing it solely a few times a month.
Additionally, on the receipt, you verify off 15%, 18% or 20% of the invoice. There’s no means for the server to maintain observe of the quantity of every particular person verify. They don’t know if they’re getting all of what’s coming to them or if the proprietor is pocketing among the cash.
Servers are solely simply now getting again to work, so I tip somewhat extra generously than I used to. I need to make certain they get their cash now.
CASH IS BETTER
DEAR CASH: I agree that money on the barrel might be one of the simplest ways to make sure the server will get each little bit of what’s meant from the consumer. That an employer would assist themself to cash meant for an worker is shameful — and but I’ve heard that it occurs to parking attendants, too.
My late husband labored as a parking attendant in his youth, and he instructed me his employer really had the pockets of their uniforms sewn shut and confiscated their suggestions. It’s why he all the time requested parking attendants in the event that they have been allowed to maintain the guidelines. A phrase to the clever.
DEAR ABBY: My husband’s sister handed away in 2013. Her husband, “Roger,” joined her in heaven three months in the past.
There are footage of their home of my husband’s household (mother and father, grandparents) that he wish to have and which are of no curiosity to Roger’s household since they by no means knew these family members.
Not understanding the etiquette for asking for gadgets after an individual’s passing, I requested a number of individuals who had misplaced shut relations when a respectful time to ask could be. All of them mentioned that two weeks needs to be superb.
I contacted Roger’s granddaughter asking in regards to the footage and instructed her we’re not enthusiastic about something however the footage. The granddaughter obtained indignant and mentioned that “everyone is already wanting all Roger’s issues.” Then she blocked me, and now I’ve no option to contact anybody. I’m fearful that the photographs shall be discarded.
I really feel horrible that I offended the granddaughter. It wasn’t intentional. I don’t actually have a option to apologize.
Was I flawed? What’s normally the etiquette in such issues?
MISSING FAMILY PHOTOS
DEAR MISSING: You probably did nothing flawed. You didn’t soar the gun as a result of others have additionally been inquiring in regards to the disposition of property. Feelings can run excessive when there’s a loss of life within the household, and admittedly, the granddaughter could have overreacted.
You acknowledged that you simply “contacted” her. Was it on-line? I ask as a result of delicate questions like this are greatest handled straight — in particular person or by cellphone.
You might be able to contact surviving family members by reaching out to the mortuary that dealt with the funeral or to the church Roger and his spouse could have belonged to. It couldn’t damage to inquire once more in a month or two, if that’s potential. I agree it will be a disgrace if the household pictures have been tossed.
Pricey Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also called Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Pricey Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.